Carra . . .

From the back of the van . . .


"Hey, Mom!"

"Yes?"

I turn to look.



"Hey, Mom, guess what I just learned . . . "



The suspense . . .




"You don't have to chew Jell-O!"

The things they say . . .

I was watching a friend's kids this weekend.

At the end of the day, I instructed the kids to clean up all the messes in the various rooms. Once they got the hang of it, I sent them to the basement to clean up one last mess.

The three boys (ages 4, 5, and 7) stood in the basement debating, arguing, and somewhat discussing the best way to tackle the job.

Sounds like they are ready for the real working world.

I was coming down the stairs to retrieve something and overheard their bantering. I stepped in and instructed one boy to pick up the trucks, the other to pick up the dishes, and the other to pick up the dress-up clothes. They looked at me with amazement like I had solved world peace (which at that moment in my day - I felt I had) and got to work.

As I was heading back up the stairs, I over heard one child say to the others . . .

"Wow, I had no idea your mom was a genius!"

Hey, I am just saying.

Then he stops and says, "Wait! She's a mom - duh! Of course, she's a genius!"

Needless to say, that kid is hanging around my kids a lot in the near future.

The Sunday Comics . . .

My favorite part of the Sunday paper was always the Sunday comics . . .

Little did I know that I would grow up . . . give birth . . . and actually get to live the Sunday comics.



On our way to church this morning . . .

I hear Carra sigh and exclaim, "How many more years before Owen can get married?"

Owen happily exclaims, "Seven Yeays."

I ask, "But why, Carra?"

Owen interrupts and informs, "Cuz, it's time for me to get a new famiwy."

He pauses, thinks, then keeps informing, "But I'm not sure which one I want to be . . . a teenager, an air-force guy or a parwent."

And there you have it . . .

Owen is getting married at the age of twelve and will be joining the air-force . . .

I'm a little concerned about the teenager - parent part though . . . I really hope the marriage thing works out . . .

Then . . .

Owen was very excited about what he learned in Sunday School this morning . . .

"We learned about Jesus. He was with a lot of people and they went to the edge of the cliff and they were going to chuck Jesus off, but He just turned around and walked through the crowd and made all the people itch their heads."

Hmmm. I missed that one in His list of miracles . . .


I think the comics are still my favorite . . .

The things they say . . .

Owen again . . .

Buff was preaching away this morning and Owen was sitting quietly (no, that's not the funny part) next to me.

Buff states, "If you choose Jesus, Jesus is not safe**!"

Owen calmly turns to me and whispers, "Yeah, and hell isn't safe either."

They always pick the most inopportune times to make me giggle.

Oh, and by the way . . . they really are listening . . .



** for further explanation you can listen to his sermon by following the links on the website. The sermon was October 25th. It may not be put on the website for a few days . . .

The things they say . . .

My nephew, Jonny, was over for the afternoon. As he walked through the room, I noticed an unpleasant odor following him, so I asked, "Jonny, are you stinky?"

Owen was nearby and came to the rescue, "I'll check, Mom."

He leans over, sniffs Jonny's backside and states, "Oh yeah, Jonny stepped on a duck."



No, I have no idea where most of his comment come from . . .

They must be homeschooled . . .

I have accumulated quite a collection of highly intellectual tidbits from my kids lately . . .

***
One child was watching Bugs Bunny. Bugs is tunneling along and pops up into the screen and is bewildered about where he is. Come to find out he should have taken a right turn at Albuquerque . . . but that is beside the point. He looks around and spots a few familiar sights such as the Eiffel Tower and various French road signs. He perks up and begins to munch a carrot as he states, "Oh, I must be in Paris!"

My child turns to me and remarks, "What? I thought the Eiffel Tower was in France?"

***
Carra wants to know why everyone in our family is white . . . but Owen is tan . . .

***
A child was looking for a specific book in the "For Dummies" series and went to search the library catalog. This child returned without a book, so I asked what happened.

This child stated, "I gave up. I couldn't spell the word 'dummies'."

I'm still giggling.

***
Carra peeled an onion and stuffed it in her pocket. (No, I don't know why.) She came to me a bit disturbed because she didn't know why her eyes kept watering.

***
We were reading a book together and a discussion about the Queen of England came up. The kids began to speculate about where she is from originally (too many Princess Diaries type movies - I'm wondering if they think all royalty is just "discovered"). One child pipes up excitedly . . . "Oh, I know where she is from. She is from Kentucky."

Seriously, of all the places to choose . . .

(In this child's defense, we had recently watched a PBS documentary on the Queen's visit to the U.S. and it briefly described her attendance to the Kentucky Derby while she was here. That was the only part of the documentary in which the child was listening . . . which is ironic because I stopped listening to the child explain this because I was giggling so hard.)

***
And as every cultured child should, Owen has learned a little poetry . . .




Yeah, they're homeschooled . . .

The things they say . . .

Aaron and Owen were playing superheroes. Owen was armed with a wooden spoon and Aaron had the nerf gun.

They were valiantly fighting off the bad guys when we overheard Owen state to Aaron,

"That guy was so bad . . . he was ugly."

The things they say . . .

Owen talks a lot. Owen often talks too much. Owen will repeat anything he hears - so be careful little mouth what you say . . .

If you have ever carried on a conversation with him, you know what he is like when he is very serious and matter of fact . . . this is one of those conversations.

He was talking to some adults at church, and I think he made them spit into their coffee when he said (out of the blue) . . .

"There is heaven. There is hell. Hell has fire. You can't say 'What the hell' cuz that's a bad word."

(Apparently it is okay to say as long as you are just explaining not to say it . . . )

Then today he came into the room screaming. I asked him what in the world was the matter.

"I bit my tongue!"

"Oh, no, how did you do that?"

"With my teeth!"

Okay. I had to ask!

The things they say . . .

Our newest Carra-ism . . .

"Hey, Mom. I just ate some fish food."

"Oh, really. Was it any good?"

"Yeah, it tastes like dog biscuits."

Ha! This is from the girl who dips everything I make her to eat in ranch dressing to make it taste better!

Don't mess with me . . .

I have no intention of making this the list of things we got for Christmas . . . but this is just too good not to share . . . .

I have shared before how Carra's little friend from next door doesn't call me Mrs. Powers, but addresses me as "Super Powers" . . . .

Well, my brother found me a t-shirt to wear supporting her brilliance . . .

Mom, can I have . . . ?

Carra has a sweet tooth like no other. If you were to ask her what her favorite food is, I wouldn't be surprised if she said, "Gum." I don't dread Halloween because of the haunted theme. I think it is all the candy that makes it scary. There is usually enough to frighten any mother out of her wits.

This morning, Carra hopped out of bed and asked me if she can have a fudgesicle. I reminded her of the rule that she needs to eat breakfast first- and then proceeded to give her the options for breakfast (i.e. cereal or eggs). She agreed and headed to the kitchen to find something to eat.

Ahh, yes. The problem has been solved . . . I came back to find that she is eating breakfast. This morning she is having . . . .

Butter.

All so she can finally eat her fudgesicle.

Consider this my new entry for "mother-of-the-year" . . .

Finally, someone sees it!

My four year old neighbor girl came up to me to ask if she could play with my daughter.

I just love how she addresses me.

"Umm, Super Powers, can I do fingernail polish?"

Who am I to correct her?

Now if I could just figure out what my super power is . . .

The things they say . . .

We saw an interesting sight yesterday when two firefighters, dressed in fire gear, carrying tanks on their backs went running down the sidewalk. I believe they were training for something because they were maintaining a leisurely jog and not a frantic rescue pace.

Carra turned to us and remarked, "Hey, look! Those fire hydrants are running!"

Hmmm. We didn't notice any frustrated dogs following close behind . . .

cdo

I found this on my friend Mark's site . . . I'm still giggling . . .

Flowers and a story . . .

Today my dear husband sent me flowers. It is a rare occurrence and a wonderful surprise. They were also appropriately timed . . . I was on the phone talking/ venting to him about my most current parenting struggle. He was tenderly counseling me on my response and my needed reaction. Getting the flowers just then was like getting the greatly needed hug! (Love the sunflowers!)

But that is really not the true intention of my post. As excited as I was to get flowers, I was more amused by the delivery . . .

Carra and Owen had just asked if they could go out and run through the sprinkler - and I said "yes." Owen did not feel he was appropriately dress so went on a search for his swimming trunks (it's swimming lesson week - they were all in the laundry) while I continued to talk to Buff on the phone upstairs.

Apparently he was in the process of changing out of his clothes and into the swimming suit when the doorbell rang . . .

Yep, it appears that he answered the door in ONLY his t-shirt. By ONLY, I truly mean ONLY.

I think the delivery lady was "exposed" to a lot more than she bargained for . . . .

The things they say . . . .

I was fixing lunch today and asked the kids to clear off the playdoh toys from the table so we could eat. One particular (older) child, feeling the need to impress the other co-workers, decided to show off a bit of playdoh trivia "knowledge".

"Did you know that people eat playdoh in order to survive in the wilderness?"

Okay, I don't know a whole lot about hiking and survival, but I'm not sure playdoh is at the top of the list of things to pack on a trip. But if you think you are ever running the risk of being bored or hungry when you are heading out into the wilderness - apparently it is worth packing . . . . anything that can serve a dual purpose can be handy to have around . . .

Oh, the things we say to impress others . . . . . I'm still giggling . . . .

The things they say . . .

Owen comes to me and gives me a progress report on Mikayla and Brice . . .

"Mom, Taywa and Brice are in the house watchin' 'Houses on the fairies.' (interpretation: "Little House on the Prairie)

The ark

Today, the kids and I were in Wal-mart when another deluge of rain passed overhead. We have had so much rain that we have reached record flooding all over the area.

As we were standing in the checkout line, a Wal-mart employee passed by us. He was a young kid looking to get a rise out of his fellow employees working around him.

As he walks by us he states loud enough for 2 or 3 lines to hear, "Hey, has Moses arrived with the ark yet?"

While everyone chuckled at the comment, the kids and I (and the people in our checkout line) got an even bigger laugh at the thought of Moses showing up with the ark!

He had no idea how funny he really was!

My job

Carra and I were having a discussion with a little girl that I am watching this summer about why she needs to come to my house everyday. I explained to her that because her mom and dad have jobs, she gets to come to my house for the day.

So, she asks me, "Where do your kids go when you go and do your job?"

Carra pipes in with the answer, "My mom doesn't work. Her job is going on dates."


Wouldn't that be the life?

Hmmmm, I haven't been to my job lately then . . .

The things they say . . .

They live among us . . . apparently . . .

I was standing by the front door talking to a friend about nothing specific when Owen struts into the room (in his unique Owen style), walks right up to my friend and states,

"Hey, you tan't go upstairs. Dat's where the humans fold the waundry."

Any suggestions how to get "someone" other than the humans to do all the work around here?